Challenging the “Trapped in the Wrong Body” Narrative of Dysphoria[TW: dysphoria, anxiety, depression, substance use]
This article is so accurate and was really helpful for me!
Q: Not sure how the weather is where you live but it being winter here helps with my chest dysphoria because I can layer on long-sleeves and hoodies to hide everything. Maybe try that?
Thanks! It is cold right now. Layers make it better sometimes. Wondering if folks have emotional strategies, too?
How do you quiet your dysphoria? What do you do to cope?
I had an especially hard day with my chest. I’m trying to wear my sports bra more because the binder is damaging my spine and ribcage, but it makes it hard to feel motivated and energized. I just feel like a slow, sad slug. :-( I feel frustrated with my body and just want to lie on the couch and watch SVU reruns…
What do you do when this happens?
Q: are you a boy or girl
Q: What would be advice given to those just starting to get interested in freeganism?
Thanks for your question! I have lots of advice about freeganism so it’s hard to choose just a few things to mention here. :-)
1.) Never, ever, EVER get into a compactor EVER! Open top dumpsters are the only safe kinds of dumpsters to get into. Compactors squish down trash and there is no knowing when those things get turned on. People have gotten killed in them, so don’t do it! It’s not worth it!
2.) Depending on what kind of things you want to look for, start a “dumpster” study to get a sense for what gets thrown away and when. Every night for a week (if you have time), check the dumpsters of your local stores and start looking in them. When are the dumpsters fullest? What kind of things get thrown away? I recommend after holidays, Fridays, Saturdays and Sundays; however, each store will have their own inventory and cleaning rotations that will effect what will be found in the dumpster later.
3.) Learn about your local laws on dumpster diving! If you get stopped by police/managers etc when you’re diving, apologize and offer to leave immediately. Just let them know you’re looking for food and you won’t be a bother again. I, of course, I still go back later. ;-)
4.) It will be nasty and smelly. You may have to actually dig and open up bags. But sometimes there can be gems in these bags! I suggest that you wear gloves, long pants/sleeves, and boots.
5.) Learn when food ACTUALLY spoils. Go to stilltasty.com to learn more about expiration and freshness.
6.) Cardinal freegan rules: Always share what you find with others. Never take more than what you need! Whomever gets to the dumpster first gets first dibs (but they are likely to share!).
I have lots and lots more ideas and tips. Message me with any questions! Happy Diving!
Transphobic website on FTM transition and Testosterone
[TW: transphobic, sexist language]
I’m disgusted and offended by the transphobic website that “tells the truth” about transmen and the effects of testosterone: Dirtywhiteboi67.blogspot.com
One commenter shared their thoughts:
“So much of what you’re posting here is right on. (male dominated) society’s “solution” to butch women is to (subtly yet forcefully & unrelentingly) encourage medical transition. Which ultimately only further subjugates these people who fall for going through with the medical process. Sad. Very sad. Each of those people transitioning FTM need a full course in feminist studies. The answer to becoming more butch is NOT to become a man (isn’t THAT cognitive dissonance for you).”
This makes me furious. Utter crap. It’s as if transmasculine feminists don’t exist or that we’re really just victims of the medical industry who desperately need feminist enlightenment by “proper butches.”
Also, just being a woman/having a vagina does not mean that you automatically don’t engage in heteropatriarchal systems or hold/enforce oppressive ideologies themselves.
Furthermore, I’ve had incredible difficulty accessing ANY trans care at all!! It is nearly impossible to get information or doctors to oversee my care. They don’t have accurate information whatsoever.
Awesome response to “Why bisexual?”
Here is an awesome article from BiRadical Wordpress that summarizes my feelings beautifully.
Here’s my story:
I identify very strongly as bi, though for a few years I also used to identify as pan along with it. Throughout those years, I went through a long process with both those words, at the end of which I dropped “pansexual” and stuck only with “bisexual”.
I’ve identified as bi since I was 13. When I first encountered the word “pansexual” (age 22), I was very pleased with the way it sought to subvert gender binaries and to create more space for people of multiple genders and sexes. I was also really happy to use a word that would distance me from the mainstream American/Western bisexual movement(s) with its assimilationism, cissexism, “both sexes” bullshit. I was certain that pansexuality was inherently more subversive, more queer, and generally better than bisexuality.
And yet I never gave up on bisexuality as an identity. I felt as if it remained my word, but for some time I felt very apologetic about it, even to myself. The first thing that created a ‘crack’ in this way of thought was this post in Bi Furious (pointing out that “bi” isn’t necessarily about the gender binary). It made me feel like “Oh. So I can keep using it”. It made me feel like I was coming back home.
Once the binary issue started dissipating, it started being okay for me to ‘return’ to bisexuality and examine why I liked it so much. I love it because for me it means community, it means politics, it means language, it means struggle and liberation and love, it means rebellion, feminism, resistance to binaries and hierarchies, and much much more. And it carries a lot more weight for me than any other identity word.
I still kept “pansexual”, though, as I thought (and still do) that it’s a great way to get people to think about gender and challenge their cissexism. But the more I got into reading texts about pansexuality, about bisexuality and about the binary, I realized that bisexuality was being scapegoated for a lot of things in a way which I felt was biphobic. I felt increasingly uncomfortable when I heard people saying things like “I identify as pansexual because bi is binary” (more and more so the more I looked into the binary accusation and realized it was false). Eventually I got sick of how much biphobia was being channeled through many things spoken or written about/around pansexuality. My final break-up with the term must have been around this post that I wrote (and which seems to have now become a bit famous…)
Right now, the way I think about it is that I’m reclaiming bisexuality. I see a lot of value in it and I don’t want to leave it to the cissexists/assimilationists. For me, bisexuality is charged with loads of positive meanings and I generally try to share those meanings with other people and encourage them to reclaim the word as well. With strangers/monosexuals, I get past the presumed binarism pretty easily, when people ask me what does bisexuality mean, I say that it means I like people of many genders. Or when people say: “Does bi mean you like men and women?” I say “Other genders, too”.
My feelings about pansexuality remain ambivalent. I think that a lot of the pansexual discussion is biphobic and that makes me angry (even more so for having done the same myself in the past). On the other hand, I also understand why people would look at the American/Western bi movement(s) and feel like, “If this is what bisexuality means, then fuck it – I am not bisexual”. On the other-other hand, I know that there are many pansexuals who feel affiliated with bisexuality and the bisexual community alongside the criticism (just like I was even when I identified as pan), and I’d like to think that we can share the same movement, or maybe make a shiny new bi/pan movement that’s radical and transgender/genderqueer and everything else that needs to be.
I just trimmed my beard and shaved my cheeks because it was getting long and itchy. I’m getting sideburns and I have a little bit of upper lip hair coming in. The most is located under my chin!
For realz. So stoked and so happy. Now, time to research facial hair styles. :-)
Q: This might be a personal question, but why do you think the label "bisexual" suits you more than "pansexual"?
Bi*sexual/bi/bisexual suits me the best because I am active in the queer and bi* activist community. (Google “bisexual umbrella” and you’ll see that ‘pansexual’ is sometimes included under the bi-umbrella.) Thus, my decision to use this word is not purely about my orientation, but also my political investments. The invisibility and exclusion of bi* people (in the broadest umbrella category sense) feels accurate for me and my experiences and describes some of my struggles with gender well, too.
My gender is pretty fluid and folks have a hard time “figuring me out.” When people hear that I am “bisexual” they read it in classic sense of being attracted to two binary genders. In a way, using “bisexual” opens up opportunities for me to queer that identity label in the first place and muddle with their assumptions.
Finally, the term “pansexual” doesn’t resonate in the same way that the identity “bi/bisexual” does. Perhaps this seems arbitrary, but bisexual feels right, too. :-) I like the expansiveness of the bi*umbrella. Since my gender is hard to pin down, I like the queerness of claiming bisexuality considering my trans*ness too!
I hope this helps! :-)